Mister Fred, Ruthless Taskmaster

Here's what Mister Fred was doing from the second I tried to sleep last night at about 12:30 a.m. until the second I gave up on sleeping about an hour ago:

1. Clicking the "Do Not Disturb" button on my cordless phone cradle over and over ... and over again;
2. Getting up on my desk and staring at me while repeatedly knocking my modem, wireless router and detachable computer speakers onto the floor;
3. Scratching through a pile of mail on the chair next to my bed;
4. Running away from me and hiding behind the couch when I got out of bed to try to confine him to the bathroom;
5. Meowing for no reason;
6. Knocking over everything in my shower the 10-15 times I locked him into the bathroom -- including my huge, metal shower caddy -- while meowing;
7. Scratching on the bathroom door;
8. Scratching on the bathroom floor;
9. Unraveling all my toilet paper;
10. Scratching loudly and for minutes at a time in his litter box;
11. Repeating all of the above dozens upon dozens of times.

This is what he is doing now that I am awake and working again: